Bone Broth





I fell today. While running in the park my foot caught a tree root and I went down. Hard. Bloody knee hard. I have been running on this path since spring. Hurdling this jagged stretch of dirt and gravel with confidence and agility. Today is the first time I stumbled.  My feet were heavy and hanging low. I have been undergoing intense medical treatment and my body is tired. My cells burdened by stress and heartbreak. My movement and mental motivation were forward, but my body was dragging two beats behind.  Such is this fight with Lyme Disease.

I am going to wear this swollen knee with a smile. Three years ago while I lay in my bed too sick to do much of anything I would have killed for an exercise battle wound. At least I am off the shelf, dust coming out of the cracks. I hit the ground fast today. But I got up even faster.

“The Lord directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives.Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand.” —Psalm 37:23-24


The Sea

The beauty of chronic physical disease is that it begins a journey
The open-ended tickets are purchased
There is a trip you must take, but how far will you go?
What will you see?
The personal mountains you scale are up to you 
A broken body pushes you
Forces you to look
The gate opens to the healing pastures
If you start and stop with the physical manifestations you may miss the greatest gift
The emotional-psychological scrubbing that becomes the crescendo.
The third act that completes the story
Don’t limit the scope of treatment to the disabilities of just your body
Dig deeper
When you think you have found some peace, an answer to these seasons of suffering…
Keep digging
You will find even more
Learn about the chakras and everyday in some way or another take a step toward God
Whether you feel him or not. Whether you believe him to be there or not
Walk forward willing to see what you have not yet seen
When your world becomes stripped away of almost everything that you thought made it so
You are right where you are supposed to be
Now listen
There are doors cracking open
The injured sick body is just the skin
Just the first layer
Find the courage to cut through the flesh
Into the organs
Through the nerves
It is inside this warm watery world that you will hear your very own heartbeat
Like a diver sees the beauty of the sea
The landscapes you travel to are up to you




Driving in New York City today
With a dying computer in the back of my car
I found myself looking up the ass of a big dirty dump truck
Moving way too slow for this fast paced woman

So I did what I do
I found a way to get in front
Timing plus precision
With a nice dose of cojones

The truth is
I’m aggressive
And I rocked at Tetris back when Nintendo first came out
So I like to maneuver my car in slick ways
Add some good loud music and this is exactly what I do
Because now I’m cooking with butter

A few blocks up I come to a stop
And the rhythm pauses
This is when it hits me
Like a high powered artillery milkshake
Some giganto processed coffee nastiness
Gets hammered into my car.

Creamy sheets of rage running down my windows
I’m sitting in a sticky Dunkin Donuts carwash of self-reflection.
Damn, Mr. Dump Truck driver, I’m kinda flattered
Usually its just the cabbies that flip me off.