THE NAME STEEL SONGBIRD


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I saw this metal sculpture in a Sundance catalogue years ago and had to have it. I felt a kinship to the artist, Steven Bronstein, and his hand forged expression of delicacy as well as strength. Grace as well as power.  That’s me.  That is what life has done to me.  Forged me in the fire.  And now I am ready to sing.

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I have been holding onto this sculpture and this name, Steel Songbird, for a long time.  The idea of writing a book and sharing a blog about my experiences with hardship and healing has been a golden coin in the pocket of my mind throughout years of debilitation.  Trapped inside a crippled body and the inside of a house with all too familiar walls, I dreamed about one day creating something that would make it all worth it.  That would help and inspire others.  Determined to not let all my suffering be for naught and to create light from darkness.  To allow the fusion of my wisdom and my creative spirt reach others and assist with my own healing journey.

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 After oodles of heavy lifting, when personal healing gained momentum and I grew well enough to work and write, I set out to share my experiences and treasures.  However, I wasn’t sure where to begin and focus my energies.  I purchased different domain names with grand plans for them.  I began developing beyondlyme.com to offer resources for people struggling with Lyme Disease.  I started building safeandsounddesign.com where all my non-toxic interior design ideas will live.  As I re-enter the working world while continuing to heal, I face the challenge of balance everyday.  Illness aside, I am inherently an over achiever and work on many projects at once.  I have learned through chronic disease to simplify and concentrate.  So I decided to package all my passions and knowledge in one place for now.  What to call it I wasn’t sure.

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 I toiled back and forth in my head with the name Steel Songbird, asking if people would ‘get it’?  I thought about going with superheather.net, but have grown tired of that name and of being so super. This is when GOD stepped in to assist me.  He knows when I get stuck in my head and truly need a signal of clarity.  My mother calls them “God Winks” and I have been receiving them for some time.  They are these magical moments & signs I happen upon when I am synced up with the universe.  When my energy is flowing in a healthy way these messages of confirmation are both delivered and received.

Photograph by Heather SolimineTwo weeks ago, I awoke to a dead computer.  Not another problem this financially strapped, sleep deprived woman on a mission needed.  Despite the stress of trouble shooting the technical issues and schlepping my heavy Mac Pro tower into the city for a diagnosis, I told myself to stay calm and to allow GOD to work.  To allow GOD to take my hand and guide me.  To say it simply, I knew there was a reason that my computer was failing that day.  So I leaned into the curve ball and went with the flow.  I softened my exhausted breath as best I could.

After my computer was serviced I headed to the doctors office for an IV.  As it is in NYC, I can walk any number of ways to get to the next point.  I can go south a few blocks and then cut east.  Or maybe walk east first and and make my way south via a zigzag.  Usually I follow the sun and the quieter street and I always keep my eyes open for the signs, the ‘winks’.

The course of events on this particular day lead me to walk streets I hadn’t been on in some time and ultimately pushed me on a course I needed to travel.  Within three minutes of leaving Tekserve, I passed this street sculpture…

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There she is.  Tall stoic bird made of steel nails.  With a creamy pink rose in her beak.  Unavoidable Beauty and Strength.  Ironic, because I hammered so many steel nails over the years.  With each renovation I did on my house, those nails drove me further into physical dis-ease.  I stopped to take her in.  To feel the powerful presence of this great sculpture.   I felt the sweeping intelligence of GOD  and the supernatural parenting of the the universe.  Here was another artist speaking to me through the collective unconscious.  “Do it Heather. Let it begin. Its time to swoop down and share your blooms.”

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